Tag: Vibrator

By Posted on Posted in Guides

When it comes to anal play, there’s a lot of information about toys that are fun to use. Unfortunately, there isn’t much about what not to use. Inspired by Ducky Doolittle’s Tantus 2.0 class, I thought this was an important subject to cover and wanted to share some thoughts about safe anal stimulation with you.

Tantus Plugs Many toys look perfect for anal play; however there are many aspects to consider when choosing toys for anal stimulation. Choosing the right toy is important for anal stimulation and can often times be the difference between a fun and erotic experience and a bad one.

One of the most common toys used by beginners is anal beads. Although these are inexpensive and look like fun, they are not the best choice. Anal beads tend to be simply round balls on a string and there can be a few risks involved using them. For instance, the string can come untied, leaving a bead inside of you. Also, after being used, the string can’t be properly cleaned and will harbor bacteria. Also, because anal beads are just that beads which can be a bit painful when inserted and removed. Because they are blunt rather than tapered, they force the sphincter muscles to open suddenly. Often times, this can cause pressure, discomfort or even a slight pain when they are removed.

A much better choice that gives the same sensations as anal beads is the Ripple. Designed by Tantus, it is made from pure silicon and the beads are elliptical. Being made from silicone the Ripple is just like your silicone cookware and can be completely sterilized after you play. Also, the beads are elliptical. This allows the beads to gently open your sphincter muscle and then it closes around the neck between each bead. Because the neck has a bit of girth to it, your muscles don’t clamp down and tight once the bead is in allowing your muscles to stay slightly open and ready for the next bead to be slipped it. With this type of toy, you can choose to insert a couple beads or all of them. They even offer a small and large version of the Ripple for both new and experienced users.

Another mistake that’s often made when choosing a toy for anal play that has a blunt head. Although some may appear to be perfect for prostate massage, toys designed like this can cause a vacuum inside your rectum causing pain or injury when it’s removed. A much better choice is toys that have a tapered head. Not only are they easier to insert, the difference in diameter doesn’t create suction while you’re playing. There are some toys such as the Prostate Health Vibrator, by Tantus, that appears to have a flat head, however there is a slope along the edges that makes it totally safe for anal play. A close inspection of your will reveal whether it’s a true flat surface or not. If you can’t tell from the image you’re looking at online while you shop, Google the toy and search images to get a clear view of the toy you are considering.

When using a toy, be sure that it doesn’t have sharp edges or seams. Some toys have seams that are left behind from manufacturing and are not smoothed down properly. While this doesn’t pose a huge risk when used vaginally, they can damage the thin lining of your rectum by tearing or scratching mucus membrane.

Always make sure that the toy you are using for anal penetration has a flared base. The rectum will suck a toy in while you are playing. Don’t believe me? Slide your finger in and notice how the sphincter draws it into further, the same thing happens with your toy. Toys without a flared base pose the risk of being sucked in all the way making removal next to impossible. A flared base stops at the outer sphincter and acts like a stopper.

Another thing to consider when choosing an anal toy is the material that they are made out of. Some toys are made from PVC, rubber or even jelly. While they may be inexpensive, they pose a few risks. Toys made from material such as these have moving molecules inside of them and the chemicals seep out through the pores. This is why some toys will have a strong odor when you open their box. Many times, people’s sensitive tissue has a chemical reaction to them causing a burning sensation and even chemical burns. I always suggest choosing silicone for all of your anal pleasure. Silicone is non-porous and doesn’t have moving molecules. They have neither smell nor taste, are completely body safe, and bacteria can’t hide and grow in them. Also, silicone is easy to clean up. It can be washed with dawn dish soap, boiled or even placed on the top rack of your dishwasher to be cleaned. However, when washing your toys in the dishwasher, don’t use detergent because it can leave behind a light film causing you to have an adverse reaction. If you adore the texture or feeling of jelly toys, I suggest placing a condom over your toy before using it anally. A condom will protect you from the chemicals and will protect your toy from getting bacteria down into its pores.

Please, never use household items inside of you. In the heat of the moment it may seem like a good idea. However, they are simply not safe. Tubes of tooth paste, shaving cream cans, the handle of a brush, bottles, or anything else you might find lying around truly can harm your body for various reasons. Sharp edges, lack of a proper base, creating suction and other issues can occur.

Hubby and I both want you to be safe while you explore the pleasures of anal stimulation. A trip to the emergency room is something that we deeply desire for you to never have to experience. Choosing toys that are safe is the most important thing you can do to avoid this. Although many toys are marketed for anal play, they’re simply not safe. Please if you ever have a question about a toy, reach out to us or another trusted source to help you decided if it’s safe. There are many sex toy stores online that have a wealth of information to help you make an informed decision and even more sex toy reviewers and educators on Twitter that are always happy to help with any question you may have. Of course, I realize that it may be embarrassing to tweet about sex toys. The DM messaging system is a great way to avoid this or simply search for sex educators online and send them an email through their site’s system. I know that, like me, they’re always happy to help and answer any questions that you may have.

https://www.tryfm.com/sex-toy-for-women/anal-toys

By Posted on Posted in Guides

Today’s article focuses on a problem that many men face with the introduction of a toy, and that is envy and feelings of inadequacy in the face of a vibrator. We will discuss how to overcome this and why you will never be replaced by a vibrator.

We vs. Me Mentality
One thing I have noticed in forum posts, online discussions, and personal discussions is that men compare themselves to vibrators. They compare the length of their penis, the girth of their penis, and how their penis can’t vibrate. But the first thing you need to realize is that you are not in a competition with a vibrator. A vibrator is not a replacement for your penis. Men get this “me” versus the vibrator mentality where everything is compared to one.
There is a reason why vibrators vibrate, come in bright colors, have patterns, and have different lengths and girths. It is because they have to differentiate themselves from your penis. They have to find a niche market where they can actually compete. You are not competing with vibrators; they are competing with you. They have to have new and novel features to compete with you and be sold.
So understand that you and a vibrator are distinct entities, that each is unique, and each provides something different. It is not a head to head competition. It is far better to think of the vibrator and you as a “we.” You complement each other and create something better together. So the first thing you need to get comfortable with introducing a vibrator is to stop the vibrator versus “me” mentality and think of the two of you as a “we.”
Things A Vibrator Cannot Do
The reason a vibrator should not be compared to you is because a vibrator cannot do many things. There is a distinct feel to a penis. It is warm, it changes because it is flexible, it can ejaculate, it swells before orgasm, and it just has a unique texture and feel to it. When you are having sex with someone, they feel your breath, you can kiss them, you can talk to them and whisper sweet nothings to them, you can moan and groan, your body creates warmth, your hands move, your movements are unique each time, and you exert pressure on her. These are all things unique to you that no vibrator can ever replicate. There is a human aspect that is so random, so unique each time, and so dynamic that it is really something special.
The biggest thing a vibrator cannot do is create an emotional relationship. A vibrator cannot tell you it loves you. It cannot surprise you with gifts, cheer you up when you are sad, it cannot love you, it cannot make you feel safe, special, or excited. These are all human things. And sex is so much more than just an orgasm. Sex is about a connection to someone. It is about an expression of your feelings. It is about intimacy. Again these are all qualities that you have that are far more important than a vibrator. When you ask someone what the most important part of their relationship is, no one says the number of orgasms they have. And that is really why a vibrator cannot replace you, because it cannot create a relationship.
Communication
Now I can tell you a bunch of reasonable, logical things, but chances are there is still going to be some doubt in the back of your mind. You are still going to have that emotional response that makes you want to smash that infernal toy. The only way you are really going to get rid of that anxiety is to sit down and talk with your partner. You need to have a heart to heart and share your insecurities. Feel free to say they are unreasonable and you want them to go away. Feel free to share your worries and your feelings. That is fine. If she is truly an understanding partner, she is going to explain how you will never be replaced. She can calm those insecurities and help you understand the things she personally likes about you best. If you are jealous at all, sit down and have a conversation. It will do so much to help you understand what she likes about sex, what she likes about you, and chances are afterwards you are going to have even better sex than before.
What Happens When you Introduce A Vibrator?
Something to think about is what happens after you introduce a vibrator. From personal experience, friend’s experiences, and online reading, it is that vibrators actually increase the amount of sex you have. You might be asking yourself how that is possible. Well the more of a good thing you have the more you want of it. How often do you have an amazing dessert and think about it for the next day? How often do you get a craving for something super delicious? Well the same thing happens with a vibrator. A vibrator makes sex better. It creates a “we.” You create a compliment. It works great for foreplay. It works great during your refractory period. It lets you have clitoral and vaginal stimulation simultaneously. And when the two of you experience better sex, you want more sex. You get a taste of something amazing and it is always on your mind. It draws you back again and again. So realize that a vibrator will not replace you, but it will in fact make you more valuable than you used to be. You now become more desirable.
So if you have vibrator envy, realize you are unique and a vibrator will never replace you. It will only ever compliment you. Realize that you likely need to sit down and share your fears and work through them. And also realize a vibrator might get you lucky more often.